# 22 Discovering some perceptions

Hello everyone,

From now on I want to write only in English, to share my thoughts to the world wide. I hope it's ok with all of you that follow my posts. Sorry for any inconvenient and I hope you'll take from Luda's Coaching Sheet as least the same value about self improvement and coaching as before.

Second of all, I will share with you a great tool of discovering a lot more about yourself through the eyes of your friends, colleagues, family and....yourself!

I have found out that I know myself less than I expected...after taking this Johari Window.


Am I : self-conscious, proud, adaptable, shy, ingenious ?!? True! that is the way that the other persons see me. It is a fair view or not?! Are they conscious about all I am or are those only some perspectives?

I want to only make a point here and not just to talk about me! It is not about how the people perceived me at a moment of my life or all the time, it is a about how I see myself in the other's eyes..it is about how I want to behave in certain circumstances and how am I perceived; the way I see myself among others. My status is crucial in my mind, the way I see myself comparing to the others.

Probably the best lesson I lived in my life was to compare myself only with myself, and to be in competition with myself.. It is the best path to take ;).

So, acknowledging and evaluating how the people around me are looking at me leads me to the idea that I have different faces at different times.This is our common feature when we talk about being ourselves and being authentic.

What about authenticity? What is stopping me to be me all the time? not to seem another person...

What is stopping you to be yourself? When are you differently as the authentic you?

I made some discoveries with myself.. Take the test and observe yourself relating to the people around you. When are you different? How? What is the reason for being less yourself?


Improve yourself by thinking at yourself a little more :)


Below the 4 areas window, there are the percentages and another window containing: Interactive Johari Window.You sign in and share the link with 6 or 10 of your friends, peers, relatives, working colleagues. The outcome is that you have picked 5 ways of how you see yourself and you find out from the people that know you how they see you (they pick 5 adjectives). The outcome is that you find some new perspectives about yourself...

Arena (known to self and others) energetic, mature, observant	Blind Spot (known only to others) able, adaptable, bold, caring, cheerful, clever, confident, dependable, extroverted, friendly, happy, independent, ingenious, intelligent, kind, logical, loving, modest, organised, proud, self-assertive, self-conscious, shy, silly, spontaneous, sympathetic, tense, trustworthy, warm, wise, witty
Façade (known only to self) helpful, powerful, searching	Unknown (known to nobody) accepting, brave, calm, complex, dignified, giving, idealistic, introverted, knowledgeable, nervous, patient, quiet, reflective, relaxed, religious, responsive, sensible, sentimental

All Percentages

able (8%) accepting (0%) adaptable (8%) bold (8%) brave (0%) calm (0%) caring (8%) cheerful (25%) clever (16%) complex (0%) confident (16%) dependable (8%) dignified (0%) energetic (50%) extroverted (16%) friendly (33%) giving (0%) happy (8%) helpful (0%) idealistic (0%) independent (25%) ingenious (8%) intelligent (50%) introverted (0%) kind (8%) knowledgeable (0%) logical (25%) loving (33%) mature (8%) modest (8%) nervous (0%) observant (8%) organised (16%) patient (0%) powerful (0%) proud (8%) quiet (0%) reflective (0%) relaxed (0%) religious (0%) responsive (0%) searching (0%) self-assertive (16%) self-conscious (25%) sensible (0%) sentimental (0%) shy (8%) silly (8%) spontaneous (16%) sympathetic (16%) tense (8%) trustworthy (16%) warm (25%) wise (8%) witty (16%)

Created by the Interactive Johari Window on 15.3.2009, using data from 12 respondents.
You can make your own Johari Window, or view LudmilaMarin's full data.

#10 Despre coachi si parinti

Sa revenim la scopul blogului si sa discutam mai mult despre coaching-dezvoltare personala.

Am citit astzi un articol despre dezvoltarea personala a coach-ilor? E necesara ...nu e necesara...se intrevede aparenta intrebare a articolului.

E ca si cum ai trimite un copil la scoala si ti ai pune problema daca e necesar sa invete ceva sau nu.
Exista coachingul pentru imbunatatirea preformantelor individuale ale oamenilor...Inclusiv coach fiind.

Asadar lasand la o parte vechiul obicei romanesc al disputei (cine are sau nu dreptate) sa ne folosim un pic de articolul mai sus mentionat (citez din "Comunicate de presa"-workshopul Dlui. Daniel Bichis).

Daniel Bichis aduce in prim plan 4 limitari ale unui coach care intervin in momentul relationarii cu coachee-ul (sunt denumite foarte frumos in articol lipsa maturizatii emotionale si comportamentale):

* incapacitatea de a percepe si interpreta corect realitatea externa,
* tendinta de autoiluzionare si autolimitare,
* dificultati de relationare cu ceilalti,
* automotivarea deficitara si dependenta de motivarea externa.

Si ca sa nu presupuneti ca doar v-am adus la cunostinta niste elemente interesante, am sa adaug (cultura e de vina !!) ca mai este necesara si cladirea increderii in sine.

Un aspect foarte important al reusitei in orice domeniu al vietii, mai ales cel profesional.

Increderea in propria persoana ori o ai,ori n-o ai. O ai doarece parintii tai au fost inteligenti emotional si ti au spus ca poti si ca au incredere in tine ca poti (iar subconstientul este obisnuit fara bariere proprii), fie n-o ai,pentru ca ai fost constant demotivat ..tot de parinti (se pare ca au mare impact asupra reusitei si fericirii noaste in viata). Adica cum sa simti ca ai lumea la picioarele tale si ca orice s ar intampla tu te poti descurca atunci cand parintii (scuze dar chiar e importanta repetitia :D) te dau inpoi: off iar ai stricat/vaiii cum ai putut sa faci asa ceva?!?!?!?

Totul trece, raman doar sentimentele oamenilor si zambetele. Sau...capul plecat si dezamagirea. Hai sa facem noi diferenta pentru oamenii de langa noi si pentru noi.

Nu e totul pierdut. Ca in orice alt domeniu munca si autodisciplina te fac sa vezi ca poti! Doar sa ai timp pentru tine, cat de putin si sa vrei.

Vreau sa am incredere in mine:

1.observ ce fac bine;
2 observ ce mi place sa fac si o fac bine;
3 apreciez si tine minte ce am facut bine azi si ieri.
4 Tine-te de treaba(1,2,3) si o sa fii increzator in tine.

Hai sa crestem impreuna!

LUDA

#6 Invat coaching ca sa fac oamenii fericiti

Cum depun atata efort in a invata si practica coachigul?!

Intrebare usoara, corecta in privinta deschiderii si importanta in privinta profunzimii.

Un raspuns simplu ar fi ca vreau sa fac oamenii fericiti. Sa le arat unde sunt ei acum, unde ar putea ajunge si cum.

Sunt o unealta cum spune cursul si industria...Un facilitator. Ador cuvantul asta. Facilitez calea coachee-ului sa ajunga unde isi doreste. Doar sa vrea..

E o emotie extraordinara sa-ti spuna "clientul"(scuzati-ma! o alta denumire din industrie) ca e fericit, ca simte ca poate, ca are energie sa mearga acasa si sa foloseasca aripile lui pe care le-am descoperit impreuna.A vrut..


Acum eu invat incat sa fac diferenta in viata oamenilor pe care ii vad si simt ca au de sapat dupa puterea lor si increderea in ei. Si eu ma ofer, sunt acolo, o unealta.

Cum ajungi in cer? Te sui in avion. Avionul vreau sa fiu eu, pentru ca imi place sa impart cerul cu oamenii de langa mine, oamenii mei.

Concluzia? :)) Iubesc oamenii si fericirea..